I want my kids to be strong and independent, but not so independent that they don't need Trevor and I every now and again.
I want them to be leaders not followers and to set good examples for one another and for those surrounding, but if they must follow, I hope they have picked good friends to follow.
I want them to have empathy for others and be willing to do service.
I want them to just be GOOD. I mean really really wholesome-y good. I hope that they have a naturally gravitate towards the good things in life without having to think about it.
I want them to choose the right.
I will never be able to give them everything they want, but I hope that even if I could that I wouldn't because I want them to know that things aren't going to be handed to you on a silver platter. That's just not reality (for most people that is), and I don't think it does your kids any favors to do this.
I want them to know how to work hard and be willing to pitch in and help whenever they can.
I want them to be sweet, kind, and loving.
I don't hope for them to be rich someday, but I do hope for them to find something they would love to do.
I don't necessarily want them to be 'popular' but I want them to be well liked.
I hope they are intelligent, and that even if studies don't come easy to them they won't get too frustrated and that they'll work at it.
I want them to always want to be around Trevor and I. To always value our opinion and ask our advice, but I also want them to figure things out for themselves.
I hope that they'll have a natural willingness and want for church and things spiritual, and that they'll serve missions because they want to not because we tell them they are supposed to.
I want them to be patriotic and PROUD to be American.
I hope they find love and have families of their own.
I hope they love Trevor, me, their siblings, and extended families unconditionally.
My list goes on and on and becomes more and more overwhelming as I wonder how in the world Trevor and I can instill these values and desires in our kids. I already know we'll be strict parents but how do we make sure that we aren't too strict? I've seen all kinds of parents and I don't want to be the kind that just jam rules down are kids throats, but I also don't want to be the kind that are too laid back. How do we find that middle ground? Trevor and I talk a lot about what we'll do. His favorite quote to say to me is from Joseph Smith: "Teach them correct principles and let them govern themselves." In other words, we'll do what we can, we'll teach them and love them but ultimately they have free agency just like we do and they will have to make their choices themselves. Sometimes we may like their choices and other times, maybe not.
6 comments:
You are such a great mom!
Those are some good wishes! I hope for the same things for my kids. Time does go by so incredibly fast sometimes.
You know, being a mom is the scariest thing in the world. I get overwhelmed so easily when I think of all the things I want for my kids and the people I hope they become. I know most of that rides on me and it scares me to death!!! I'm learning more and more everyday that the best teaching method is example. If I want my girls to talk nice to each other, I have to talk nice to them. If I want them to be happy, I have to smile even when I don't want to. If I want them to appreciate what they have, I have to tell them no and make them earn something new... but then also tell myself no and let them see that. I figure something new out everyday, things that you would think are no-brainers, but obviously things that I need to learn time and time again! You've always been great with kids, I'm sure you're an awesome mom to those boys!! :O)
It sure can get overwhelming when you think about all you want your kids to be and all you have to do and be yourself to help them get there. This was a wonderful list. I would have to agree with it 100%. I want to be firm and kind to my kids...that's a hard mix to figure out some days. It sounds like you and Trevor are well on your way to raising your boys to be amazing men! They are very lucky.
I agree...it is so hard to find the middle ground! Whenever I think about the people I want them to become, I always wonder if I am doing my best to facilitate their growth and development. Such a huge responsibility! I loved the Joseph Smith quote, it's a great thing to remember!
Good post!!! I want all those same things for my kids, and spend quite a bit of time wondering how I could possibly teach all of those principles. It's overwhelming at times. My visiting teaching companion told me the other day that staying close to the spirit is the only way to effectively parent. He will teach us what is and is not important to teach our kids. You and Trevor will do great! I know you will. You are a good person, and a great mom.
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